I'm high on the LD & low on the PDA only because I like being part of a secret community, if you know what I mean :D
Aww, Alyssa's so cute when she claims she's unloved. 3 years is too vanilla, you gotta get some spearmint.
& I on the other hand, could do with vanilla for a while. Riding the high tide's wearing me out bit by bit.
Methinks I need to wind down that brick wall & soften up sometime.
I feel like crying sometimes because I feel so alone. When I end up writing nothing more than 5 lines & wasting every page in my notebook. When I've so much random things to say without an outlet to hear me out, only because I don't speak in proper, direct sentences in times like this. When I'm wide awake in the middle of the night. I'm too old to have my mom at my beck & call. I don't even attempt to wake her up & she doesn't need to, technically. It's not fair to tell her that I feel alone. Cos she is. She's been alone since she came here & she told me once that this family's the only thing that shoves that feeling down the dumpster.
& here I am, still planning to move out in 3 years' time. But I wanna curl up next to Mommy & tell her things about me. Talking till the sun comes up or when it's time to go to school. But hell no, I have to sleep now. Fucking BA's at 9am tomorrow. I can't screw this.
